Voicemails, book recommendations, gear talk, and the debate every dad with kids away from home eventually has: is it actually better to live near family, or does distance make you closer as your own unit?

What This Episode’s About

Adam and Ben run through listener calls (analysis paralysis, staying present instead of chasing outcomes), Ben’s re-read of David Goggins’ Can’t Hurt Me as a new dad, and a Dad Day update on the site relaunch and new YouTube content. Then they dig into the real topic: what it’s actually like raising kids far from extended family, and whether the grass is greener closer to home.

The Big Takeaways

  • Just send the text. Following up on a listener’s story about reconnecting with friends, Ben tried it himself: “A lot of them came from ‘are you alive’ as my text. And every single one of them had something incredibly hard going on.” One low-effort text, real results.
  • Re-reading the same book at a different life stage hits differently. Ben on revisiting Can’t Hurt Me as a father: “To be that committed to one thing, to be that successful at one thing, you have to drop off some other stuff.” Fatherhood reframes what “winning” even means.
  • Boredom is part of the deal, and that’s fine. Ben’s honest take on the infant stage: “Some of this stuff is boring, and I think just embracing the boredom during some seasons and being consistent with it is okay.”
  • Living far from family can make a marriage stronger, even if it doesn’t feel that way some days. Adam’s take: “We’ve had to rely on each other. I feel like we’ve gotten way closer as a team, just a family unit.”
  • Don’t romanticize the move you haven’t made yet. Ben’s closing line after weighing whether to relocate closer to their parents: “Unless you’ve done it before, a lot of this is romanticizing. Pull out a sheet of paper, put pros and cons down, talk to your family about how much they can actually help.”

Best Quote of the Episode

“It’s easy to romanticize on what you think it will look like, but it might not be that way, you know. So I would heed some caution when you’re thinking about the next big move, and really think about where you guys wanna be.” — Adam

Listen to Episode 16
🎧 Spotify/Apple

Related Reading

–I Downplayed It — Guys Being Dads Ep. 11
-Read: Living Near Family vs. Not, on Dad Day

Join the Conversation
Living close to family or far away, and have a take on which one’s actually easier? Email us at podcast@dadday.co or call 833-DAD-SHOW. We might play it on the next episode.